Trauma and the past
When earlier experiences still shape how you feel today, therapy offers a careful, steady place to make sense of them.
Many people who come to therapy describe a feeling of never quite being enough. They may be capable, caring and successful by other people's measures, yet carry a quiet, persistent sense that they're falling short, or that if others really knew them, they'd be found out.
Low self-esteem isn't a flaw in your character. It usually makes sense once you understand where it came from, and it can change.
What it can feel like
Anxiety looks different for different people. You might notice:
A harsh inner voice that criticises, compares and rarely lets up
Finding it hard to accept praise, or dismissing your achievements
Feeling responsible when things go wrong, even when they're not your fault
Putting other people's needs first and struggling to say no
Perfectionism, or putting things off for fear of getting them wrong
Shame, or a sense that something is fundamentally wrong with you
Holding back in relationships, at work or socially
How therapy can help
Trauma therapy isn't about making you relive the worst moments. A good therapist will go carefully, at your pace, and help you feel steadier before going anywhere near the most difficult material. Often the first part of the work is simply building a sense of safety, in the room and in yourself.
Over time, therapy can help you:
Understand your reactions as understandable responses to what happened
Notice when the past is being triggered, and find ways to settle
Make sense of experiences that may never have been put into words
Loosen the hold of shame and self-blame
Feel more connected to yourself, your body and the people around you
All of our therapists have experience of working with the lasting effects of childhood and relational trauma.
What to expect
You start with a free 15-minute consultation with the therapist you choose. You won't be asked to explain what happened. It's simply a chance to see whether they feel right for you.
Sessions are usually weekly and last 50 minutes, in person at our rooms in Nottingham city centre or online. You stay in control of what you talk about and when.
Common questions
Will I have to talk about what happened in detail?
No. Many people find they can make real progress without going over every detail. Your therapist will check in with you and never deliberately push you faster than you can manage.
What if talking makes me feel worse?
Therapy can sometimes stir things up, which is why pacing matters so much. Your therapist will help you find ways to steady yourself, both in sessions and between them.
Is it too late if it happened a long time ago?
No. People come to therapy about experiences from decades ago and still find it helps.